May Lamentation

May is here and for some personal reasons, it is not my favorite month of the year. Maybe I need to change my attitude regarding this month, however difficult it may be. For now, I believe my attitude is fixed on May with too many things not in its favor. For instance, I have a birthday in the month of May that continues to age me more and more aggressively each passing year. Spring college football practices and scrimmages are over. The annual pre-season college football magazines haven't hit the shelves yet. Where I live, it isn't warm enough in May to really enjoy the lakes and having fun in the water. The dawn of yard work begins in the month of May with additional "honey-dos". It is just a sad month for me. I really hope I'm not alone in this.

I suppose I should look at the other side of the coin to recognize the positive things that May brings. Some of the perks for some of you may be the time to start planting your gardens and getting your hands in the dirt again. Mowing your back lawn to start getting ready for BBQ season with friends and family. Mothers' day and flowers. Warmer weather with the sounds of robins and sparrows singing from the tree branches in the early mornings. I suppose it is all about the attitude you bring to the month of May.

Even my children bring in different attitudes into our home. My oldest daughter is 10 years old and has this attitude of "why are you bothering me because I'm much smarter and more experienced in all things than you" to both her siblings. She receives new information from younger siblings by responding, "Yeah! So?" The word, "whatever!" is commonplace in her vocabulary of comebacks. She is getting well-versed in pre-teen language art and subtle airiness. One time when the children were in the small confines of the bathroom to brush their bedtime teeth, the brother, who is three years younger, slipped off the stool that's placed before the sink and landed on her foot. Well, D.Q. (Drama Queen) busts out a loud "Ouch!" and yells at little brother and punches him in the arm while continuing a yelling fit to grab the attention of the patient-depleted parents. He explains that it was an accident and apologizes with sincerity on his face and in his submissive voice. She doesn't accept the apology by continuing the rampage. The annoyed parents attempt the "calm and separate" technique for the two children. The older child is clearly fine and not really hurt at all, while the younger is in tears and has taken physical and emotional abuse. Attitude!

Clearly, the 10 year old is the "oldest child" and absorbs some delusional thoughts to justify the behavior toward younger siblings. It's life! However, my son, who is sandwiched between two girls in age, brings a different air and attitude into the home. Up til now, he still is very willing to perform his chores and duties faithfully and joyfully like the Seven Dwarfs as they "Whistle While You Work"-attitude. So, D.Q. is carrying a sticky-dart gun like Rambo waiting for enemies, and despite the thousand times the parents have vehemently instructed not to shoot toward other people, she springs from around a corner and from a foot away shoots at little brother like a hillbilly blasting critters. The dart flies straight to his left eye, as I stood in wonder. It even made the sound like a dart does when it sticks to a mirror or the front, screen door window, to make me think his eye was wide open upon impact. Immediately his eyelid tossed the dart down to the floor as quickly as his body fell. I stood there knowing that I needed to say something to the oldest as some form of discipline but in temporary shock to say anything on the spot. All I could muster was something about "how stupid" and how many "thousands of times" the parents have suggested avoiding humans as targets. She must have seen the impact angle a little more differently than I did because she was sincerely and remorsefully sorry for what she did to his eye. I was blistering mad at her, but trying to stay calm for him not to freak out about losing an eye (very difficult task). As we all huddled together on the floor, I sat beside him with my arm around him holding him close; and Billy the Kid kneeling behind him rubbing his back with apologies. Finally, it happened. Something I didn't expect. After another sincere apology from sister, my son twisted his body to reach an arm around her to hug her and said, "It's OK." All was forgiven. Just like that. She wasn't trying to hug him for comfort, but he stretched to make the initial effort. I was touched (softy). She was touched too as she again said sorry and said she didn't mean it (at least not directly in the eye). He then replied, "At least you're a good shot." It was a major trial not to bust out laughing. Attitude!

So, this post is strictly for me to remind myself that May isn't that bad of a month if I approach it with the right attitude. In the past, I have treated it like my daughter with snobbery and destruction; as if I were to ignore it, it will go away quietly - and quickly. I need it to pass because I've already read about my favorite college football teams and their spring drills and the magazines don't come out until June. So, what good is May to me? Now, I need to bring a forgiveness and a loving presence to the month of May like my son, from here on out. May was always my favorite month as a kid because of my birthday (when does that stop?). May can still be the best month of the year. I just need to remind myself often the many good things about it. I mean, not everything revolves around college football, right? Right? Does it? Hmmm.

Anyway, I need to be more like my son in all aspects of life! I can't continue being sad about May and what it deprives me from, but what it brings and what it sets up to deliver. We all can be happy about that.